|
Post by wchristenfaith on Sept 16, 2017 19:14:04 GMT
Just my apology to anyone I've ever rubbed the wrong way
Me hoping I can do the final thing I need to do to win this game. I know i have to have a good speech, and take the right person, but in order to do that I need to win immunity. It may be an uphill battle, it may not be. But I need to fight hard no matter what it is.
Wish Dayle communicated with me about her vote. It couldve been a game changer. I voted her out because I really did think it was me or her; however, I really dont understand why AJ and Ricky kept me. I think Dayle staying was the smart move, but I'm glad they didn't make it.
I feel really bad for Dayle. I hope when you read this you know I love you, even if I wasn't always the best at expressing it.
I see one scenario where I get 3rd, one where I get 2nd, and one where I win. It's the oddest thing.
|
|
|
Post by wchristenfaith on Sept 16, 2017 19:24:17 GMT
If you replace a showmance with messy personality, this is me if I win.
|
|
|
Post by wchristenfaith on Sept 16, 2017 20:01:25 GMT
Just on an personal note, I just realized how exhausting it is to care what people think........ I need to stop caring.
It'll be a process, but I got the power!!!
I dont care what people say I'm proud of myself
that is all
|
|
|
Post by wchristenfaith on Sept 16, 2017 23:27:36 GMT
Ill do a vid about my game tonight or tomorrow (probs tomorrow), just so everyone knows where I'm coming from. I don't play like most people, I rely on nuances, camouflaging myself and molding people's perceptions of me and others (using multiple methods, from moves to conversations), as well the little details of human nature that people don't consider often, but I want to prove that the way I walk is worth respect.
If I had to describe everything that made my game what it is it would be very long winded, I need to shorten it down, find a way to express my thoughts in a way that is calming, articulate, yet powerful.
Idk if Ill even get the chance to plea my case, but if I do I want to be extra ready. Second place or first place, or hell even third place, I need to end this emotional (I like the word "passionate") season for me on a high, with my head held high. Even when I feel it's me vs the world, I want to show the world who's boss.
The reason I struggle so much in games is I'm such a nurturing person in my real life, you probably don't believe me but my friends call me oddly calm xD I swear it's the games that do it, but I play sort of like a villain. I face moral dilemmas way too often. I have to put myself in another realm that I'm not used to, but for me it's the only way to win. It's trippy
I haven't received much love all season. In fact I've gotten the opposite. I haven't received much love in my life in general; I didn't have the best parents growing up (always on drugs, bringing dealers into the house, in prison, etc), <--- don't worry I don't mind sharing my story to people and no I don't want pity lol I really want people to see where I come from in life as well, and maybe that's why I'm so emotional. Regardless, I'm beginning to learn I'm worth the love. Even when people like Dayle and Billy didn't like me, I tried my best to extend love to them (even if it wasn't received xD), same thing with people in facebook comments (GABE). I understand how I come across sometimes even I don't like me sometimes lol so I hold no hard feelings this season, it's all in my intense tone of voice, or my teary voice xD, but every day, I begin to grow more comfortable in my skin, and learn about myself, so I can help how I come across better. No matter what happens, I know I'm worth the love.
Yes I know I post excessively, but when I view games I love to see posts, hopefully this group is the same, haha!
|
|